I've noticed that when I speak to people, I always end up talking about myself.
Me: So what have you been up to today and what did you pick for your options?
Friend: Today I had to buy some sweetcorn for my mum to make dinner. You?
Me: oh I hate sweetcorn, my mum always cooks it though, today I bought chocolate.
Me me me me!
Do you know what I mean? Like I don't want people to think "she always talks about herself and never asks you things" or something like that, I thin I need to learn how to converse more or something.
Me: So what have you been up to today and what did you pick for your options?
Friend: Today I had to buy some sweetcorn for my mum to make dinner. You?
Me: oh I hate sweetcorn, my mum always cooks it though, today I bought chocolate.
Me me me me!
Do you know what I mean? Like I don't want people to think "she always talks about herself and never asks you things" or something like that, I thin I need to learn how to converse more or something.
Answer:
Hello,
Nothing really seems wrong with your example. You opened up with asking them a question, they answered and reciprocated the same question as they should. Then, to keep it going without it being too much about you, answer their question then ask them something about themselves or relating to the topic you're speaking, for your example;
"Me: oh I hate sweetcorn, my mum always cooks it, though, today I bought chocolate.....where did you buy the sweetcorn from?
or
"Me: oh I hate sweetcorn, my mum always cooks it, though, today I bought chocolate.....what kind of business are you looking to go into?
or
"Me: oh I hate sweetcorn, my mum always cooks it, though, today I bought chocolate.....dark chocolate is my favourite and white chocolate taste terrible to me! What do you think?
If you keep adding your own input but bounce a question back to them, they'll never think it's all about you even if what your imputing is more than them. Some people prefer to be listeners and don't mind at all if you talk about yourself extensively just as some people like to be talkers and talk about everything and anything anytime.
I'm just like you actually; one of my closest friends even told me: "You love yourself a lot right? You always talk about yourself!"
I was shocked. But since then I always try to look at the person in the eye.. that way even if you cannot/ don't want to stop talking to another person about yourself, you are connecting in such a way that the person would think that you care about him/her all the while!
Hope it helps you!
"Me: oh I hate sweetcorn, my mum always cooks it, though, today I bought chocolate.....where did you buy the sweetcorn from?
or
"Me: oh I hate sweetcorn, my mum always cooks it, though, today I bought chocolate.....what kind of business are you looking to go into?
or
"Me: oh I hate sweetcorn, my mum always cooks it, though, today I bought chocolate.....dark chocolate is my favourite and white chocolate taste terrible to me! What do you think?
If you keep adding your own input but bounce a question back to them, they'll never think it's all about you even if what your imputing is more than them. Some people prefer to be listeners and don't mind at all if you talk about yourself extensively just as some people like to be talkers and talk about everything and anything anytime.
I'm just like you actually; one of my closest friends even told me: "You love yourself a lot right? You always talk about yourself!"
I was shocked. But since then I always try to look at the person in the eye.. that way even if you cannot/ don't want to stop talking to another person about yourself, you are connecting in such a way that the person would think that you care about him/her all the while!
Hope it helps you!
Much Love,
Iam Aehr. :)