"Stop! Don’t Break That Gate!" (Hymen)

"Have you ever wondered why God carefully positioned a membrane of blood in a lady’s intimate opening? It is a thin thiny membrane that partially or completely covers the opening of the womanliness. It is called the “HYMEN”. Why would God-Our Maker put a breakable tissue full of blood at the very door of the intimate opening of the female? Why is it so carefully placed at that entrance, like a ribbon tied at the entrance of a new house about to be launched? Why is it filled with blood that spills away when it is broken? Why?

Without doubt, the HYMEN IS A GATE! It was God(our creator) who set that blood-filled vessel there as a covenant blockage, a sign and a token of a covenant between the bearer and whoever plunges into her opening. Before God, the disvirginity of a lady is not a casual act of fun. It is a serious covenant struck and confirmed by the blood shed on that day. This is God’s way of saying, “Whoever plunges in to this woman shall only be able to do so by making a blood covenant to be joined to her for the rest of his life, from that point onward. Little wonder why intimate intercourse was designed by God to take place only and only after the marriage contract is sealed."

Hello People! :D

Well, I know that the above was quite a lengthy introduction or rather a quote that I wanted to put up to try delve into this whole HYMEN Thing. Honestly, this tissue has never been a raised issue in the family I hail from, but it was not until I got to High School that friends introduced me to this topic- and My, my! Was I startled- Apparently some women around the world are expected to bleed on their wedding nights as proof of their purity.  +Maheemah Sonia Bokhoree  Now, I'm sure Maheemah would have ended up asking if it is compulsory to consume a marriage on the first night itself. Well- what if they don't do "it"- How can people be so stupid?! :P

But modern medicine tells us not all pure women will bleed. What's more, it is illegal in Islam to accuse a pure woman of immoral behavior. 
+ayesha nanhuck  This turns out to be interesting!

Now- just in case you are wondering what this hymen thing is about;

Most females are born with a hymen, ''a thin piece of skin that partially covers the vaginal opening (or introitus). The main purpose of the hymen is to protect the vaginal opening and the areas immediately surrounding the introitus during a female's early developing years.''

Despite its biological function, many cultures place a significant amount of importance on the hymen and whether or not it is intact. This small and seemingly insignificant piece of tissue is of such great importance to many cultures because an intact hymen is believed to indicate the chastity of a female. The presence of the hymen implies that the female is a virgin- apparently defined as ''one who has never engaged in sexual intercourse.'' The importance of a female's chastity is often emphasized in patriarchal societies and by traditional religions. Some arguments that are used to back this notion are the presumption that a chaste bride values fidelity and the that there is an increased guarantee that her offspring will be her husband's children and not someone else's. Men are also encouraged to seek virgins as wives because they are deemed “pure” and not sexually promiscuous.

In most cultures of the world, female sexuality is managed – either by law, custom or social mores – more tightly than male sexuality. Women are judged more harshly than men for having sexual partners before marriage. Women who have too much sex before marriage – or, in some cases, sex at all before marriage – run the risk of being accused of whoredom. Men who have lots of sex before marriage are just sowing wild oats before settling down. Unmarried women may play one of two roles: whore or virgin. Men have a few more options.

Religious authorities often condone this double standard, either explicitly or implicitly, even though most religious texts that deal with the subject exhort both men and women to sexual purity. 

Reality is:

1. Some girls are born without a hymen;

2. The hymen may tear naturally when a girl plays sports or engages in any physical activity;

3. The hymen is not always smooth but tends to be perforated and that the perforations may get bigger and cause the hymen to break once a girl menstruates;

4. The hymen can be broken by the use of tampons;

5. The hymen may be very small or very elastic so that no breakage occurs at all (some women even become pregnant while their hymens are still intact);

6. A hymen may not bleed when broken.

Given these facts, it is extremely sad that women all over the world are still expected to bleed on their wedding nights as proof that they are virgins and that they often pay severe consequences if they happen not to bleed, possibly being shamed and humiliated, instantly divorced or even killed.

 ''To avoid such disasters, women have resorted to various tricks to ensure that they bleed, including the use of animal blood in their private parts or even cutting themselves, while wealthier women often get gynecological exams before marriage and do hymen-repair surgery in the event that no hymen is found. There is so much confidence in the idea that an intact hymen proves virginity that the trend in many countries now is to have one's daughter "officially certified" as a virgin by a clinic. This is so embarassing for the girls that a number of them (most notably in Turkey) have committed suicide rather than be touched by strangers.''

+shammahthepooh@hotmail.com relates cases where her Mom has patients in Mauritius conducting the Virginity Test!

*I realized how scary this whole situation can be for women when I read a young woman's question on an Islamic discussion board just now. Extracts: 

1.  I am a 22 year old muslim sister who is currently looking for a husband. My cultural background is such that people can only tell that you are a virgin if you have a hymen. Scientific fact is that some women don't have a hymen and others break theirs easily.

2.  Although i am a virgin, i am terrified of what my wedding night holds because if there's no hymen (please Allah i hope there is), my family and even my husband (whoever he might be), would doubt my virtue.

Now, while you thought only Asian and Middle East Countries are smeared with this issue, have a look at this:

" The hymen carries a great deal of importance and symbolism even in the United States. There have been instances in the United States, especially among college students, of people being eager to lose their virginity as soon as possible. In this case retaining one's virginity is seen as a stigma of inexperience. However, in many places in the U.S., losing ones virginity still carries a stigma for young women. Perhaps because of the stigma associated with this act, men and boys alike are sometimes eager to be the ones who “take” a girls virginity."

 One Last Religious Quote: 

"The one who made the body (the hormones, organs, nerves, tissues, e.t.c) said it in clear terms in 1Cor.6:13 , “Now, the body is not for fornication”. Anyone who chooses to use the body for fornication must know that he/she is working directly against God’s plan and there would definitely be a consequence either now or at old age!"

Did You Know?

A few side notes. Did you know that in a young female a broken hymen will heal itself all on its own? Did you also know that even if a woman retains her virginity her hymen will eventually disappear completely with or without sex?

Did you also know that there is a booming cosmetic surgery business in the Middle East that repairs broken hymen for women so that they can appear to be virgins again?



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